You, Her, and The Universe

You, Her, and The Universe.

 

 

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On to the Next Suffering

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Let’s have a look at our lives, our day to day. We strive for some great experience, craving it. Desiring it. Yearning for it.

Finally got it!!!!

Aannndddd before you know it…

You’re on to the next suffering!

You finally got what you always wanted, that very thing or experience you couldn’t wait to have, and almost instantly, there’s a new suffering! Now that you are here in this circumstance, your sad that you can’t be there in that other circumstance.  Oh life.  You finally met the most beautiful, kind, loving person in the world.  She’s amazing! But she’s not that girl over there.  Now you can’t be with that other girl and you can tell she wants you.  Oh the Suffering.

This is a constant disease, one that we all have.

Buddha put it best; life is suffering.

But it’s really the longing, the wondering, the desiring that we’re so programmed to do [click to continue…]

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She’s Like A Rainbow and Yet You Make Her Grey

So Many guys miss the moment when attempting to connect with a women. They are so focused on the outcome that the girl before them just becomes a way to “get what he wants”. Of course, any self aware girl can feel this and it repels her.  So he rarely ever does get what he wants.  He then falls into frustration and even despair. Has this ever happened to you?

When this is happening you are being driven by your ego in an attempt to prove your self worth by getting validation from others.

Yes, I know…you are like “John, I just wanted to learn how to meet women. Why all this psychology?”. Well, because I see it everyday with my clients. They come to me stuck and suffering in this trap.

They literally have become like “a terminator”. Everything is “what can I get?”. They miss the joy of the moment and they have lost touch with a “deep instinct to connect” on every level. Have You ever felt this way?

When you learn to move into “Instinct” and operate from a place of giving and sharing you will discover a new way; a new life.  Suddenly, the world turns from black and white to a full on rainbow.

You learn to appreciate each women for who she is. You revel in each exchange no matter the outcome, as a Victory.
You stop complaining about “what isn’t” and you start “loving what is”. Would you like to feel that way? Then Watch This Video : )

Looking forward,

John

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5 Lessons an Actor Knows That Will Transform Your Life

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For many years I was an actor in NYC.  I devoted my life too it.  I studied with great teachers, worked on many projects, had the pleasure to work with many talented people and even lived in a dusty room in the back of a hoarders Lair.   During those years of grinding it out in NYC and building character through fire I tested my metal in just about every way.  I explored the question “who am I” over and over.  On a stage, there is no where to hide so I learned to strip away all falseness and tap into my “true persona”.  Every rehearsal was like training in human connection.  The core of a powerful scene in acting is simply two human beings Listening, Relating, and Responding to each other. When I went to the “street” to overcome my own social fears and limits and develop my “skills of engagement” I used everything I had learned in acting.

Some lessons I share with my clients are these:

Rehearse The Role Of The Connector

Rehearsal, Practice and Repetition are the only way to get good at anything.  Most people don’t look at being social and flirting the same way, but they should.  When you take on the “I’m just rehearsing” mindset it removes the majority of pressure.  You stop feeling like you are in life and death situation.  You start having fun exploring and discovering the part and the scene, just like an actor.  It’s the timeless scene of boy meets girl and you are rehearsing it over and over.  Through every exchange you learn more about yourself, women, and humanity.  In order to become the role of the great connecter, you must rehearse each part of the scene over and over until it is second nature.

The Most Important Part Of The Scene Is The Other Person

Often times people try to meet people with memorized scripts or routines or feel they have to demonstrate a series of attractive qualities in their attempt “to get the girl”.  When you follow that process you immediately become disconnected from the other person and become a false version of yourself. It’s infinitely more effective and rewarding if you simply know thy self and tune into the other person like your life depended on it.  From them you will get everything you need to make a real connection.

There Is Nothing You Can “Do” That Will Ever Be More Beautiful Than Just Simply “Being”

You might be entertaining and even amusing but nothing is and nothing your mind can create or all the minds in the world working together can create will be as powerful as…

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Moving Beyond Every Single Risk Point

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In any given conversation, there’s a series of places where most people stop.  They give up.  More accurately they give into fear.  Obviously, at each place there’s a point of anxiety where the dark voices, the monkey men, come in and start telling you why not to do it, you’re not good enough, and they’ll tell you to move away, walk away, eject, and run.

We must train ourselves to move past each “Risk Point”, and I’m calling it a “risk point” because a risk is where you take a leap to the next place, and you’re not 100% sure you’re going to land on your feet. It’s exactly a risk that you might be rejected.  It’s a risk that you might not be accepted.  It’s a risk that your compliment or your assertion might not be received.
So these are all the little risk points, and we’re vulnerable at each place.  And this is what we must train ourselves to move past. This is why we would walk down the street saying hello to lots of people. This is why we would start five or six conversations on any given day just for the sake of it.  This is why we’ll give people compliments as we see them so with practice it’ll get more comfortable.  Does that make sense?

For example, one risk point would be [click to continue…]

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The Ultimate Mind Set: The Social Explorer

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When flirting with the opposite sex, we often get into a hunter and prey mindset.

Straight away, we fall into a world of lack because we’re following a faulty paradigm. And this faulty paradigm is the success/failure paradigm. I’m successful if I get a phone number. I’m successful if she smiles. I’m successful if I get laid. I’m successful if…

The problem is even if we have those successes they’re immediately followed by things we don’t like: failures.

The reality is that it takes practice being social. It takes lots of talking, connecting, and exploring in order to have any of those outcomes.

So with that success/failure paradigm we never really get there, or when we do get there we just don’t feel that good.

We feel bad about ourselves every time someone doesn’t smile; every time we don’t get a phone number; every time she has a boyfriend; every time someone rejects our wants; every time someone doesn’t give us a kiss; every time we don’t get laid.

So everything is based on success and failure, which is filled with exhausting emotional lows, and a couple of highs.
But imagine leaving that track.

Imagine leaving that horrible disaster, and moving into a paradigm where [click to continue…]

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The Most Romantic Story Ever Told: The Story of How We Met

The Story of “how we met”! One of the Most important stories a couple has. A story that, when in a relationship, you will repeat countless times. The first thing her friends and family will ask is…”How did you meet”. It’s an integral part of the romance.

As the man you are the leader. It’s up to you to create magic in the moment and it’s up to you think this far ahead. Do you want your story to be we met on tinder or in drunken haze in a bar? And then the two of you inventible lie and wish you had a better one. Or do you want it to be filled with heart pounding trepidatious adventure. Let your story be that of a romantic hero filled with boldness and action. Watch this Video…I’ll teach you how.

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Men – Why You Need To Be Beautiful

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Beauty is not a word often attributed to men, and it’s not something men often aspire to.

More often, adjectives like hard worker, tough, strong, smart, sharp, sincere.  These are things men can aspire to be — rich, wealthy, a provider, a good man, etc.

We might say it about something we see in nature, when we look in a baby’s eyes, or a great work of art. We most certainly are obsessed with the beauty of women, her hair, her eyes, those lips, her legs, her ass. The way she moves and talks…”She is so Beautiful!”

But what about us?

What about us men?

Can’t we be beautiful too?

Well I say…you ought to be.

If we want an amazing life, we must become amazing. If we want truly soulful and beautiful women in our lives, then we ourselves must become beautiful. We must come to know our very essence as beautiful and emanate it outward.

When we understand attraction at its core, it literally means to pull to us. And what are we pulling to us?

It’s what we’re putting out.

So if we’re putting out harshness and toughness and anger, that’s pretty much what we’re going to get back into our lives.

How can I become one with a lovely, sincere beautiful creature if I’m not that at my very core, also!?

This doesn’t mean dress up in high heels, smatter lipstick, and act overly effeminate. :  )

It means nurture, cultivate, and honor yourself as a beautiful light in the world and emanate it outward.

Today, walk around and be beautiful from the inside out.

Imagine your very essence; your very core is so beautiful, so bright, that when people look at it they’re in awe. When they see you and look into your eyes, they see true beauty.

Today, give yourself affirmations that revolve around you being beautiful. Your thoughts are beautiful, your actions are beautiful, and your touch is beautiful. Your essence is beautiful.
Your words, however they come out of your mouth, they’re beautiful. The way you affect other people is beautiful.

People look at you in awe; all they can express is, “That man is beautiful.”

Today, expect beauty to come into your life in every form. The people you meet, every little experience you have, beauty is coming to you.

Expect in the near future that a woman is going to come into your life and she will be beautiful, not just on the outside, but from the inside out.

Tell the women you meet today what’s beautiful about them.

Remind yourself how purely beautiful you are, and only the highest level of beauty can come to you. Only the highest level of beauty will match you.

To True Beauty,

-John

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The Art of Settling In

Most men go into hunting mode when they want to meet a women.They walk around the bar, the streets, the cafes, wherever they are with a feeling of eminent lack. They are Seeking and Searching. They are in essence empty and looking for something to fill the void.

We have all been there. We seek to find companionship to end the hunger and loneliness.
But something happens in your search; You slip into a world of lack. You emit an energy of lack and sometimes it gets even worse you fall prey to desperation.
Do you know the world worst Cologne?
“Desperation” ; )
It literally does the opposite it repels the very women you are wanting to connect with.
As you walk around trying to get something you miss all the opportunities to enjoy the people around you and the places you are.
In This Video I teach you The Art of Settling In. It’s an important lesson on your path to become a powerful connector.

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There Is No “One Day” (Remove the Obstacle)

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There is no “One Day”.

There is only what is happening right now and what you want and what’s in the way.

What’s in the way, usually is some barrier you put up in your mind. For example, let’s say right now you don’t have the best living situation, you don’t have like a big fat pad on a hill in the mountains or your own place in the city.

Let’s say you’re in that situation and now you’re on a date and you don’t have anywhere to bring the girl. So you put it in your mind – well there’s no where I can bring girls, I can’t really date them, I can’t take them back to my parents or my place is a dump or whatever and it stops you from even saying hello. Or stops up from going further as far on the date as you should, as you could.

You put these barriers in your mind… so remove them.

Don’t let their be one day. That’s our biggest stopping point, the One Day Disease.

It goes something like this – one day I’ll have my own apartment then Ill have everything I want, then I’ll bring girls home, then I’ll do that. It’s like, look — dam it I didn’t clean my place so I’m not going to bring her home or I didn’t do this, I didn’t do that so I’m not going to talk to her because I didn’t go to the gym this week. When I get — you know I’m not going to
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